Christian Dating Guide

My Christian cousin is insane?

My cousin is just an eighteen year old, she turns nineteen in four months and is graduating from High School in a few days. She has all A's, did take college classes down at the local college, co-oped, has got a free ride to college next year, received a 29 on the ACT.. and is dating a 25 year old male! They have been dating for 6 months and they both want to settle down! She's only 18 and wants to ruin her life! She doesn't drink, smoke, party, anything of that sort.. she rather just read books -study or just sleep! She's mature for her age I just don't think she's right in the head? What to do? Would you allow your daughter to date a 25 year old? Opinions? They are both very religious Christians as well. Thanks.

Public Comments

1. I hope she continues her education.
2. She's 18 so her parents don't really have a say in if she is allowed to or not. If she's happy why try and piss her off?
3. Right in the head? It's really none of your business...you sound a bit jealous...
4. why not if they love each other and she is an adult so she can make her own choices. the more you try to convince not to do the more she will.
5. Sounds like she's mature enough to decide what she wants and 7 yrs is not a large age difference. It would probably be advisable for her to go to college etc first and see what is out there, but it is her choice.
6. I was 16 when I married my then 25 yr old hubby....sounds like she has her head on straight...and he does too...whats the problem>?
7. Once she turns 29 it won't seem like that big of a deal..
8. She's going to do what she wants. Nothing you can do. If it's a mistake than she'll find out later.
9. 18 and 25 does seem a little out there, but the girl does seem to be really mature for her age and also has her head on straight. The seven year difference will not seem so much in, well, seven years. Give them your blessings, be happy for them.
10. its sad. Cuz you know that if she gets married and has kids that young she will divorce and go off the deep end at about 26-27 and ruin her life because she was so oppressed and never got to experiance 'good times'. Unfortuneatly, there is nothing you can do. Good luck
11. She sounds a lot like me, actually, although I'm 26 and frankly don't want to bother with anyone right now. I don't drink, smoke or party--and I'm a practicing Wiccan. That probably threw you for a huge loop, as it isn't just fundamentalist Christians who want to keep their brain cells intact for later use. It sounds to me as though you might have a bit of jealousy going there, actually--why is her performance and her religion so important to this question otherwise? When someone's 18, that's an adult and they have the right to decide who they date.
12. Your cousin sounds like a bright young adult and am quite certain she can conduct herself in a manner she feels is best. I would not stop my adult son or daughter from dating whomever they choose. It is not for me to decide and only my place to advise when asked.
13. Does he drink,smoke and party to much because that can ruin her life.. But whats wrong with a 18 and 25 year old. Joseph was like 30 when he married mary and she was like 13.
14. I know if it were my child, I would be a little freaked. The only thing, for me, is I got married when I was 18 to a 27 year old. We are also Christian and now have been married for 12 years with two girls. I think it is a personal decision. For me, I still got to go to college, so it was not a sacrifice in that area, but you do miss out on some things. In the end, if you really love the person and feel it is the right thing for you and what God wants, then nothing should stop you.
15. Mine is 18 and dating a 25 year old, but she is also very mature for her age, he is immature. You just can't tell another person what to do. If you want you can pray and ask God to show them if they are not right for one another. You don't say how old you are?
16. my husband is 46 and i am 36. we have been married 19 years. i was 17, had 3 kids before i was 20. now have 2 more. i couldn't be happier. we are both christians.
17. that is pretty sad. it sounds like she's going to throw away all she has going for her to become a housewife and pop out a bunch of kids. not my thing but maybe it's her. i tend to believe you're right that she's insane. unfortunately her parents can't do anything about it.
18. Her life doesn't sound very ruined, it actually sounds quite nice.
19. umm good luck
20. Would be nice if she continued her education, but she is of legal age to make her decisions, we dont always agree with the decisions of our loved ones but they are theirs to make. Just keep her in prayer. As for allowing my daughter..... once she is 18..... not much i can say one way or the other. Whether i like it or not.
21. Let them live their life and be happy. She is not trying to force you to marry. Why try to discourage her?
22. While I personally feel that 6 months is too short a time to determine whether or not it's a good idea to marry a person, it's her decision. I don't really think she's insane for doing something you disagree with...speaking of which, you sure you're not a Christian? Just...kinda...sound like one...
23. how are you going to get advice on here?? insane is a bit harsh probably and what makes 6 or 7 years too much older she sounds sorta normal which makes me question you ..... or at least anones ability to make a judgement considering information given and even then .. isn't it her life ??
24. I don't necessarily believe that their religion has anything to do with it....although if they are getting married at such a young age FOR RELIGIOUS REASONS, she's probably already a lost cause. There's really nothing you can do...I can say that they're almost guaranteed to fail as a couple. I'm 20, and I've come to realize that too many people my age are jumping into marriage, college, etc., just because it's expected of them or because they don't have the necessary life experience to understand that they're making unrealistic decisions. As I said, there's nothing you can do (and I literally mean NOTHING....trying to break up the engagement will only make you look like the bad guy). All you can do is sit back and let her make her own mistakes.
25. I don't see anything wrong with it. Actually, if she is mature enough (and she sounds like she is), that's what she needs: a slightly older guy, because most males her age are probably not as mature as she is. Leave her be.
26. she is not insane 25 is a little old but that does not really matter at least it is not ten years that would be a Lil crazy but not drinking or smoking or anything is good she is smart i am 18 and i do not drink or smoke!
27. if you are also Christian you are not to judge her for what is or is not insane & if you are not Christian "Why do you not just be happy for her if she is happy for her self?? it is not a crime to love & age is not a consideration where love is concerned!
28. LOVE can be treacherous at times. When one, especially the woman, has given up on herself she will fall short of her COMPLETE being. Although, many women will give up everything, even their souls for their TRUE and only LOVE, to each its own. .....but the only TRUE LOVE IS GOD. We all learn and mold our being with maturity from our experiences in life; but some never learn. ...but like they say, "when you catch the bug you catch the bug.!?" PRAY FOR HER! GOD BLESS!
29. She seems VERY mature. I think she can easily handle dating a 25 year old. As long as he's also mature and doesn't pressure her into anything she doesn't want.
30. Why do you think she is crazy? Marriage isn't an end to your life. I know it isn't for everyone. I do have trouble understanding the way you phrased your question. You make it sound like because she doesn't drink,smoke or do drugs that she has no life. If she is happy without all the "sinful" things then why are you so upset with her. Or are you more upset with what you think she should be doing and isn't.
31. That sounds like a nice life if you ask me. I'm 31 and my gf's almost 23. We are happy. Age makes only a small impact, if any. Apparently they are a nice, young, Christian couple. THUMBS UP FOR THEM!!!